London PART 1: No cool titles here, because they speak English.

16Apr08

…But hey, just imagine that title in a sweet accent! Because that’s how all the British people talk. With AWESOME accents. Seriously, I wish I had a British accent. Pretty much more than anything in the world (although not more than I want to live in the Amsterdam cake shop and go to the Rijksmuseum every day.) One of the things I wanted to do most in London was speak with a British accent all the time and pretend to be British, and see if people would figure it out. Except I didn’t actually try to do that because I was afraid that my accent, however good my friends might say it sounds, would be obviously Americanized and clearly learned only from the Harry Potter and Love Actually movies, and then I’d just look like a complete tool in front of the really cool British people. So, instead, I contented myself with obnoxiously talking to poor Anna and Fred in a British accent every so often and swallowing the urge to continue my accent speaking while ordering my coffee. (Where they could tell I was American, accent or no, thanks to the fact that things ordered with skim milk are ALWAYS called “skinny” there, and “to-go” is never said, but instead “take-away”.)

…On to less embarrassing anecdotes… But before we begin, I want to note that I’m thinking of a way to catalogue/show all the art that I saw this semester so I think I will get less into the art that I saw in England (oh and believe me, there was a lot), and just go over the highlights, in this post. More on how the heck I’m going to organize all the wonderful art I saw at a later date… for now, pictures!

PS: This post is absurdly long. OK, you’ve been warned…

Tuesday, 11 March

We had a pretty low-key evening because I’d just gotten in from Amsterdam. So we just walked around the Buckingham Palace area, got Starbucks (oh, how I missed you, Starbucks!) and pretended that the pound wasn’t double the dollar whenever we went to do something. We also had a delicious dinner of fruit and cheese and wine! Ooh, it was tasty! And very classy might I add. Anyway, these are the gates of the Buckingham Palace. They are mighty fancy as you can see.

A statue in the middle of the garden-y-square-type area (I’m dying to call it Piazza, but that’s not the right word. OH. PARK.)… in the middle of the park. That girl in the foreground does not look very happy. Cheer up, you’re in front of Buckingham Palace! It was kind of windy though. As we were standing there, a helicopter flew over our heads and proceeded to land within the Palace, probably on the Queen’s special rooftop landing pad, or something. I am convinced it was the Queen herself. (Although it probably wasn’t. But let me think that so that my London experience can truly be complete since if she WAS in the helicopter, I sort-of saw the queen!)

This is the Park (park, right, not piazza) near Buckingham Palace. It was very pretty and green. There were a lot of pigeons. (I remember we were particularly fascinated with one who only had one leg… Why I remember these things, I do not know. At least I didn’t take a picture of it.) Moving on…

Wednesday, 12 March

The REAL London tour begins!! This week was literally a wonderful fantastic whirlwind of museums, sites, and lots of fun because I was reunited with one of my best Vassar friends YAY! So, okay. We began the day at Leicester Square (which, although you might THINK it should be pronounced, Lye-chester square, is actually pronounced, Lester Square. Again, do not ask me why. It is a mystery like the mysteries of the relationship between the pound and the dollar). At Leicester Sq. we bought tickets to see Spamalot, YEAH!! We were going for Rent, but it had sold out, and so I suggested Spamalot. We got ground-floor seating, which was awesome, for 35 pounds, which seems awesome until you do the exchange rate, which is simply better not to think about.

Then we went to the National Portrait Gallery! It was pretty cool. The best part were the more recent portraits, contemporary and modern. They had some neat exhibits of really beautiful photographs too. I also saw a portrait of Kenneth Clark, whose Wikipedia entry might make him seem really awesome and I’m sure he was really awesome and half of me really wants to just admit that he was awesome because he sort of was BUT at the same time, his Leonardo da Vinci monograph sits on my bed staring at me, reminding me pointedly that I have not started my essay about Clark’s book, and then I remember how much I don’t want to write that essay. …But the fact remains he did some really impressive stuff (like, he was the Director of the National Freaking Gallery!!! at 30!!! That’s only TEN YEARS away from my age right now. Gahhh!) and the point of this paragraph is mainly that there was a portrait of him in the NPG and I freaked out a little because even then, at spring break, the paper was looming, as it still does at this very moment. Moving on again..

This is Trafalgar Square, right around the corner from the National Portrait Gallery!

AND, better yet, the National Portrait Gallery is mere steps away — in fact, is in the same building as — one of the most incredible, amazing museums in the world, the National Gallery. It is SO AWESOME. My lord, how I love it. But that’s another day, so I will wait to gush, and simply say that I still to this moment do not know how Anna and Fred pulled me away from the entrance after I took this picture. …You can kind of see from the angle I didn’t want to leave…

A fountain in Trafalgar Square. I think that is my hair blowing into the camera, since it’s reddish… It was windy that day, what can I say, but this would have been such a cooler picture if my hair wasn’t in it!

Ahhhhh. That is a sigh of happiness at the wonderful memory of this amazing building. How many times can I describe it as amazing and wonderful? Just you wait until I actually get to the art inside!

We walked a bit and ALMOST had lunch in this cafe which, it turns out, was once a crypt. I am not joking, it is called, Cafe in the Crypt. Needless to say as appetizing as this sounded we decided instead to go to…

PRET!!! Ooh, I love Pret!!! Not just for their awesome advertising campaign (“Diets are sad,” says the gingerbread man with a whole in his belly), but for their awesome fresh food – salads and sandwiches and not a bad latte either! It’s like Panera’s, except they are really all over the place (like Starbucks-es in NYC, although there are a ton of Starbucks in London too, no wonder I loved it so much), and they are super into recycling and saving the environment. Actually, England is REALLY into that. Everything you see reminds you, “do you really need that many napkins?” or “throw me out when you’re finished!” In fact, so many of the ads on TV were actually related to reminding the viewers that there is an energy crisis and that we need to be really careful with the earth. It was great. I wish America would do something like that!

Anyway, refreshed after lovely Pret, we headed on our way to see Big Ben, Parliament, and Westminster Abbey.

Double-deckers! Sooo cool. And yet also dangerous. Maybe that is part of the cool factor.

The London Eye! We never actually rode it, but… we talked about it. And took pictures from afar. That counts for something, right?

BIG BEN! I wonder what it is actually called? The Big Clock of Parliament? Oh wow, according to Wikipedia, both are horrendously wrong. Turns out that’s not even Big Ben. Now I feel silly. Apparently, this is the clock tower (wow, it doesn’t even get capitalization on Ole Wikipedia!), and Big Ben is actually a BELL, officially known as the Great Bell. Which… is located somewhere else on the Parliament building. Who knew?

Parliament! The guard stolidly glares at passersby and is probably in more tourists’ pictures than he could ever imagine

Our expressions in this picture are pretty priceless. “Oh, we’re taking a picture? …What? Well, at least we have coffee so we can pretend like we’re awake!” (PS I’m sorry I got you addicted, Anna)

I’m still trying to figure out why the lamp posts have the Chanel logo on them. Or am I inadvertently proving my consumer-raised American-ness by even mentioning that?

The press followed us around all day… This was the second time we saw videocameras! But I don’t remember the first time… Good story, huh? Moving right along…

Inside Westminster Abbey, which is a HUGE gothic church with a bazillion famous people buried in it including a famous anonymous soldier (? who may also represent every soldier who’s ever died for England), a whole bunch of kings and queens and dukes and earls, AND the coolest bit, a whole chapel dedicated to POETS!! (Naturally I would find that the most interesting part.) Chaucer, Browning, Dickens, Hardy, Kipling, Alfred Lord Tennyson… dude, they’re all there. Along with the very important kings and queens of England. This pretty little picture is of a little garden area outside the Abbey which we couldn’t really(or weren’t supposed to) go into because it was closed, but… we may have peeked in anyway

We went backwards into the church, so at the end we saw the facade! Hi Westminster Abbey. It is really big. The guard outside chuckled at us and told us that we really needed to step back if we wanted to get it all in. Then he offered to take a picture of us. This was 1,000 times more cool than it sounds because he told us all of this in an English accent.

Some of England’s most famous things: The London eye to your left, NOT Big Ben in the center, and Parliament on the right. And some dude in the front, not a famous thing of England, but still in the picture

Prerequisite phone-booth picture on the way back from Big Ben! I mean, not Big Ben

We stopped at the National Gallery Cafe (imagine it: we WENT INTO THE CAFE, but NOT into the museum. Unthinkable! I don’t know how I did it) to fuel up before going back to Leicester Square to see Spamalot. We were all starving and needed caffiene… but we settled for the sugary goodness of a raspberry vanilla cupcake instead. YUM. Of COURSE the National Gallery Cafe has awesome cupcakes, because the National Gallery is the second coolest place on earth, right after the cake shop in Amsterdam.

Then we went to see Spamalot after having a dinner at a pub in the theater district!! Naturally, I had a burger and CHIPS. Not chips like pringles, chips like fries, glorious American-y fries. One of the other greatest things about England is that unlike in Italy, they let you order tap water, and so we drank copious amounts of free, wonderfully free water all throughout dinner! (In Italy you have to pay for water and it has to be bottled. They usually refuse to give you any other kind even if you ask. Alas.)

Thursday, 13 March

The next morning, I met Anna and Fred at the COURTALD, which is a really sweet museum that was once a house! I should take this moment to mention, I can’t believe I haven’t mentioned it before actually, how AWESOME THE TUBE IS. Like, seriously. The Tube is the best thing EVER invented. All other inventions, including sliced bread, pale in comparison to the efficiency and clarity that is London’s subway system. From the happy British lady who pleasantly tells you what stop you’re about to be at and reminds you to “mind your step when you alight!”, to the color-coded stops with all their perfectly British names, I was pretty much in heaven every time I rode the Tube. Moreover, their equivalent of a Metrocard? A matte, cheerful blue squarish card called the Oystercard. Two points British (accent, Tube), zero Americans (sorry, homeland).

So, enough of the Tube, guess what is INSIDE THE COURTALD????

THAT!!!!! THAT is inside the Courtald!!!!! Oh my!!!

Anna told me there was a surprise in the Courtald and I would freak out when I saw it. She knows me well. This is Manet’s Bar at the Folies-Bergere, which is incredible. Meditate on the reflection, there… I will refrain from babbling about how awesome this painting is and instead promise that there will be more written on it soon.

Also, there are a lot of stairs inside the Courtald… but they are pretty stairs.

I don’t know why I took or uploaded this picture (perhaps the double-decker buses?) but let it serve as a way to remind you of the difficulties of walking in England. Everything is backwards. People drive on the wrong side of the road, and then you must figure out how to walk around them. Luckily there are instructions on the streets that tell you how which way to look, which is helpful… as long as you’re remembering to look down before you look right– I mean, left– I mean… see, I told you it’s confusing. However, if you just look both ways twice and then maybe a third time if you’re a nervous nelly like me, you should be OK. I only almost got hit once! (Thank you for saving me, Anna.)

This is like a weird bridge connecting two buildings. I just thought it was cool. (Compare that to the Vasari corridor! Same purpose, totally different. Of course, there is the time difference of a couple centuries, give or take, but whatevs.)

After the Courtald, what could be better than a pre-lunch perusal of HARROD’S!?!?! Which is like Disneyworld, in the sense that it is fantastical but also (unless you’re, um, really wealthy) you can’t take any of it home with you, and it must forever remain as a memory in Florida. Or London.

Ahhhhh bask in its wonder. And this is a side entrance.

Harrod’s even has FOOD. And it was all decked out for Easter! There were literally 31 restaurants in the store! IN it! And the map they give you is like a beautiful publication in and of itself!! It is actually sparkley!

Ok, I’ve calmed down now enough to share one of my favorite window displays. This man, whose name is probably Alfonso or something equally exotic, can be seen as the typical Harrod’s shopper (or husband), looking suave in his tux; he can afford not only have all of these precious gems, shoes, and flowers lying around on his living room floor, as well as (inexplicably) a statue of the Medici Venus in a wedding veil on it being put to no other use than to apparently look pretty and/or be impressive. Not only that but, if he so wishes, he can VACUUM UP all of these various expensive objects from his crushed red velvet carpet. Who know swhy he would want to, but he can do so if he likes. Which he seemingly does. In fact we might even say it is his … “Passion.” Harhar, OK I should probably stop making fun of this window display hm? Who comes up with these things?? Moving on…

OH YEAH, Harrod’s even has a fake water floor that when you walk on it splashes around. See how it moved after that guy walked on it!? CRAZY!!!

Friday, 14 March (happy birthday Mom & Lil!)

In your guys’ honor, I went to the National Gallery and had the best day of my life. No joke. The National Gallery is better than Disneyworld. Or Harrod’s. (But maybe not the cake shop.) Words really cannot do justice to how great this museum’s collection is. Anna and Fred were such good sports about me flipping out, being close to tears, and whapping them on the arm while saying, “OH MY GOSH, I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS IS HERE. CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS IS HERE?” Thanks guys for putting up with me, haha!

I know I said I wouldn’t do this, but highlights, because I can’t resist. You should probably skip this paragraph if you don’t just want to hear me babbling on about how every great masterwork in the world is essentially in the National Gallery. Titian’s Bacchus and Ariadne (is SO beautiful and blue; might be my favorite in the whole collection although how can I choose!), Gerard David’s, HOLBEIN’S awesome Philosophers painting with the , Leonardo’s Virgin of the Rocks and St. Anne cartoon (beautiful cartoon; and after seeing both Virgins in person, I’m convinced the London version is not by Leonardo’s. Ask me why in person, I won’t put you through my theories here!), Bronzino’s bizarre Allegory, Raphael’s Pope Julius II!, Uccello’s Battle of San Romano (I have seen ALL THREE now! go me!), and oh lord, the Northern Renaissance room: Van Eyck’s self portrait, The ARNOLFINI WEDDING PORTRAIT, his Leal Souvenir, Van der Weyden’s portrait of a Lady and Magdalene, Campin’s Virgin with a Fire Screen… all in a tiny room, clustered together, just chilling there being masterpieces. So beautiful. I had ten minutes alone with the Arnolfini — no words! Continuing… Botticelli’s, Lippi’s, Ghirlandaio’s; Durer’s St Jerome; Velasquez’ Toilet of Venus(! – not what you think, Lil); Rubens, so many Rubens, El Greco… Lorrain, lots of Poussins, Hobbemma, Rembrandts. Carl Fabritius’ peep box painting of Delft!! Lovely De Hoochs!! And of course, the crazy weird Vermeers; so bizarre and melty. The best thing in the whole museum: Hoogstraten’s Perspective box, SO AWESOME. Caravaggio, Supper at Emmaeus! Turner, so many Turners, famous famous Turners! The Fighting Temeraire, Rain Steam Speed. Constable’s Haywain, no joke. Gericault’s Horse Frightened by Lightning. Courbet, Corot, Monet, Seurat, Cezanne. Ingres, Ingres, Ingres’ Moitessier, Ahh!! one of my favorites of all time! And my favorite Rococo paintings, Hogarth’s fantastic Marriage ala Mode paintings… We did all of this in, I think, 4 and a half hours? The best four and a half hours of my life!

One of the best parts of the National Gallery is how, just like in all the 19th century prints you see, artists really do come in here with an easel, set up their sketching tools, and just start to paint and draw. It’s so awesome. What’s even more awesome: All these museums are free, just the way they should be!

We decided that we needed to have a proper tea time, and also, we were so tired and even though I was on an art high I definitely needed caffiene, because there was still the London Bridge to see that day! So we went to the National Gallery Cafe, where they had a pretty affordable tea time set up, and feasted upon yummy tea, watercress sandwiches (no crust, natch), and lots of little pastries and at last at last a SCONE! With some special kind of butter I don’t know what it’s called, but sweet butter, basically. YUM.

Then we Tube-d it over to the London Bridge! Which was not falling down (you know I had to make that joke)

A view of skyscrapers from the Bridge

A view from below the bridge

The last day coming soon…. but since I wrote all this the other night, I thought I would post it before I go to Brussels, Ghent and Bruges this weekend. Buon viaggio a me and to all of you have a good weekend

Chelsea

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